Life is too short for regrets
Many people realise what they regret about their lives when it is too late to do anything about it.
When we are young, often in our childhoods, we have dreams – big dreams – of what we want to do and experience in life. For some of us it is travel to exotic and different locations around the world. For others it is to experience the joy of having a family of their own. And for others it may be the desire to climb the executive ladder to lofty heights. And, of course, for some of you, you’ll want it all!
One often repeated regret, is that people wish they had not worried as much. You may have heard that at least 80 percent of what we worry about never happens! So perhaps that regret is one we should all take note of!
Caregivers in hospices often get to spend time with people at the end of their lives, and this is when they get to hear about some of those regrets. Wishing they had travelled more or regret for the amount of time they worked rather than spending quality time with their family when it counted! Fathers or mothers who didn’t really get to know their children, rather feeling the pressure to work long hours to support their family’s financial needs. How sad it must be to wish you could turn back the clock and yet how nice they get to share these thoughts with someone who cares.
When it comes time for you to organise a funeral for someone close to you, how much do you think you’ll know about what they would like to be included? Have you sat down and had a real conversation about their wishes with them? Or is this something you don’t want to think about, let alone talk about?
In my own family, my father insisted we talk about what he and our mother wanted for their funerals, well in advance too! So even though at 3am in our local hospital after my father suffered a late-night fall when it was not quite what I wanted to discuss, I duly took notes on the back of a supermarket docket I found in my bag! But it was all worthwhile when it came time to actually organise the funerals of both parents. My sister and I were able to deliver lovely eulogies at each funeral, play music they loved and read cherished poems, all thanks to the time spent discussing details of our parents lives and their wishes for their final farewell. In contrast, when my husband’s father died suddenly some years ago, we had absolutely no idea what he’d like for the funeral, or who to invite, so had to guess, which makes it even more stressful than it needs to be.
Swansong is able to help you to create a useful record of important details about your life that someone else will need to close down once you’re gone, such as property, insurance and financial information. You can’t necessarily rely on them finding a file on your computer, or assuming that there will be time to go through such details before you go. In the record we create for you at Swansong, we also include details for your funeral and friends and family members to notify, if you’d like to have these details written down in advance. That way, your family will know just what to do to honour your life when the time comes to plan your funeral. They’ll be grateful, I’m sure, knowing they will be doing just what you would want.
